Right ok so... patience is something everyone wishes they had more of. I definitely have asked for more patience more times than i can remember. And I think I have been given a true test of patience and most definitely a test of trust and faith.
We all expect things to happen when we want them on our time schedule. But thats not reality. Learning to trust and have patience is hard and for someone like me who tends to be a bit impatient at times its a nightmare. haha Something I have prayed for, for a long time has come into my life. Or at least I think it has. I dont know for sure. I have faith that it definitely could be. And now that its somewhat here I want it all completely and now. But no, I must continue to trust and wait. Honestly it not as gruesome as I am making it out to be, but it is not easy. For one, I have no idea what im doin. I know that waiting is for the best, probably because of that reason. I dont know what im doing nor do i have any experience to back it up. I might lose my head and thats not a good.
God has a plan I am sure of it. And I thankful it is in my best interest. I like the quote... the Will of God will never lead you where the Grace of God will not follow you. Makes sense. I am very blessed and thankfule to God for taking care of me and knowing whats best because I know i sure dont. Even tho I think i do and I sure do fight Him on it sometimes, but I do my best to remember that He is in control and if I would only step back and let Him lead me, I wouldnt have to worry. Life wont necessarily be easier, but I would have a peace that would surpass anything unpleasant.
So many thoughts I am unable to express. uggh if only i knew how to put them into words. Luckily God knows. and I guess thats what is most important anyways.
Two more days and then i have my first orientation for my first real summer job. kinda scary but Kendra will be with me and I am so thankful for that! June 2 is when I officially start and so does my summer classes. im in for a looooooong summer. But i have some cool people in my life to help make it more fun! Remember keep praying!
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
ok so..
Ok so, honestly if i plan on anything it never happens. This in itself is not a bad thing, just something i have to remember so i dont get soo attached. So i was supposed to be living in this house and what not. Even cleaned it, moved in and was getting it ready for my other roommate. Well needless to say the family changed their minds last minute and now we must move. haha I cant help but laugh. So im looking for a new place, but im not worried about finding one so it will be ok.
hmm.. lets see. In a week I will leaving for memphis for orientation for my internship this summer. Im excited and nervous. It will be a true learning experience. But luckily my friend Kendra will be there with me.
So anyway, I feel as though my faith is being tested these days. What with the house and with people i am coming into contact with recently. I know in my heart that everything will work out whether i realize it or not. I feel as though it is time to open up and just see what happens. I mean I wont know anything unless i try. Its just hard to think that it wont be mutual, but what I have to remember is God is in control and His plan is perfect. He knows whats best and I honestly want to do His will. I just pray he be in His will for me. So yeah.. God is in control.
Well, I take the GRE tomorrow. Kinda scary! But it will be ok. If I need to take it over I at least have time so all is well!
Anyway.. im off to workout, clean, and eat. Keep on praying!
hmm.. lets see. In a week I will leaving for memphis for orientation for my internship this summer. Im excited and nervous. It will be a true learning experience. But luckily my friend Kendra will be there with me.
So anyway, I feel as though my faith is being tested these days. What with the house and with people i am coming into contact with recently. I know in my heart that everything will work out whether i realize it or not. I feel as though it is time to open up and just see what happens. I mean I wont know anything unless i try. Its just hard to think that it wont be mutual, but what I have to remember is God is in control and His plan is perfect. He knows whats best and I honestly want to do His will. I just pray he be in His will for me. So yeah.. God is in control.
Well, I take the GRE tomorrow. Kinda scary! But it will be ok. If I need to take it over I at least have time so all is well!
Anyway.. im off to workout, clean, and eat. Keep on praying!
Monday, April 28, 2008
communication
Communication is an interesting thing dont you think... some people are rather good at communicating whether it be feelings or facts they have it down. While others had one or the other. And then some dont have any at all.
Communication is how we connect with people whether its verbal or non verbal. Communication is how we develop and form relationships with others. And since we are made to be a relational species dont you think that communication is highly valuable???
So why is it, that we focus less on our ability to communicate with others properly. Why is is that so many issues come down to the lack or inability to communicate and sadly with those we are closest to.
Maybe we all need to sit back and take a good look in the mirror and tell ourselves what is really going through our minds so we know how to say it to others. Plus if you cannot communicate with people ten inches from you how can you expect to properly communicate with God... just a thought.
Communication is how we connect with people whether its verbal or non verbal. Communication is how we develop and form relationships with others. And since we are made to be a relational species dont you think that communication is highly valuable???
So why is it, that we focus less on our ability to communicate with others properly. Why is is that so many issues come down to the lack or inability to communicate and sadly with those we are closest to.
Maybe we all need to sit back and take a good look in the mirror and tell ourselves what is really going through our minds so we know how to say it to others. Plus if you cannot communicate with people ten inches from you how can you expect to properly communicate with God... just a thought.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
changes
Things in my life are changing, rather rapidly in fact.
To name a few:
1. I will graduate December 13, 2008, Lord willing.
a. Which involves taking the Senior Exit Exam, applying for Graduation, and finishing my Senior Cummulative Project.
2. I will be moving into the Champ's house.
3. Working at my first real job as an intern this summer at Youth Villages.
4. I will be taking the GRE.
5. Applying for jobs.
6. Figuring out where I want to live.
7. Figuring out how to work in another confusing factor into the ever changing equation.
I am still in awe that I can seriously graduate in Dec of 2008. I never dreamed that was possible. Though all these things may be minor to you, they have been on my mind, and frankly I have been unable to even process them. When big decisions need to be made, while I usually tend to go with my gut instincts, that does not keep me from serious processing. I don't wanna rush into anything. I want to make sure that the conclusion I come to is in alignment with God's will for me. Sometimes this is a very hard thing to do/know. I finally feel comfortable with graduating early. Though I have NO IDEA what is going to happen from now until then, I am at peace. I know that as long as I stay close to God and continue to seek Him, He will not leave me, and His Spirit will lead me in the direction He knows is best. I just pray I don't fight Him too much, on any matter even if it hurts. He luckily can see the whole picture whereas I can only see so far in front of my face. There are so many things to think about and really worry about, but really I cannot do anything about them now. The only thing I can do is continue on like am, doing the best I can, and taking it all one day at a time. So if you ask me what my plans are, honestly, I don't know. I know that I have goals and hopes of what I want and where I want to be, but truly God will be the judge of all of that, and I will continue to trust/pray and have peace/hope/faith in Him who knows what is best for me and my life. I pray that I will be able to share this all with someone special someday.
So many things to think about, but I won't. That only makes me worry and doubt. Changes are happening around me, to me, and I will go along with the flow holding true to myself and my faith. My Psych. teachers always say, "Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere." So true!
Anyway, I am not sure as to the purpose of this post, but to let everyone(really just my fam since you guys are the only ones that read it!) know what's new in my life. Keep praying, interceding for one another is very important! What's new with everyone else?
To name a few:
1. I will graduate December 13, 2008, Lord willing.
a. Which involves taking the Senior Exit Exam, applying for Graduation, and finishing my Senior Cummulative Project.
2. I will be moving into the Champ's house.
3. Working at my first real job as an intern this summer at Youth Villages.
4. I will be taking the GRE.
5. Applying for jobs.
6. Figuring out where I want to live.
7. Figuring out how to work in another confusing factor into the ever changing equation.
I am still in awe that I can seriously graduate in Dec of 2008. I never dreamed that was possible. Though all these things may be minor to you, they have been on my mind, and frankly I have been unable to even process them. When big decisions need to be made, while I usually tend to go with my gut instincts, that does not keep me from serious processing. I don't wanna rush into anything. I want to make sure that the conclusion I come to is in alignment with God's will for me. Sometimes this is a very hard thing to do/know. I finally feel comfortable with graduating early. Though I have NO IDEA what is going to happen from now until then, I am at peace. I know that as long as I stay close to God and continue to seek Him, He will not leave me, and His Spirit will lead me in the direction He knows is best. I just pray I don't fight Him too much, on any matter even if it hurts. He luckily can see the whole picture whereas I can only see so far in front of my face. There are so many things to think about and really worry about, but really I cannot do anything about them now. The only thing I can do is continue on like am, doing the best I can, and taking it all one day at a time. So if you ask me what my plans are, honestly, I don't know. I know that I have goals and hopes of what I want and where I want to be, but truly God will be the judge of all of that, and I will continue to trust/pray and have peace/hope/faith in Him who knows what is best for me and my life. I pray that I will be able to share this all with someone special someday.
So many things to think about, but I won't. That only makes me worry and doubt. Changes are happening around me, to me, and I will go along with the flow holding true to myself and my faith. My Psych. teachers always say, "Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere." So true!
Anyway, I am not sure as to the purpose of this post, but to let everyone(really just my fam since you guys are the only ones that read it!) know what's new in my life. Keep praying, interceding for one another is very important! What's new with everyone else?
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
drama drama drama
I am sick of drama! Why cant we all just get along? haha if only! The simplest of things always seem to get turned into huge ordeals and I dont know how! oh well..
So the Willow retreat is this weekend and it will prove to be an interesting one to say the least! Luckily I will leaving for part of the day Sat. to go canoeing with the GW group from home and Im so excited about that. Partially because I havent seen or hung out with my parents in a long time. I just feel like I should be there and I really want to be there. I need a break from my life sometimes too! So yeah anyway, maybe I can get someone else to go as well! =)
All in all im sure it will turn out fine, just the days leading up to it all just dont seem worth it and makes me dread the whole thing. But I have faith that it will work out! Should be a busy weekend luckily i dont have a really rough week next week!
Oh and I get to move into the Champ's house(the house where we have all our group activities) in May which I am totally excited about! Its a house rooms are huge, full kitchen, cheap rent. It looks like an old persons house but maybe we can fix that up! =)
Anyway, life is going pretty good overall.... Im so thankful for that! God bless!
So the Willow retreat is this weekend and it will prove to be an interesting one to say the least! Luckily I will leaving for part of the day Sat. to go canoeing with the GW group from home and Im so excited about that. Partially because I havent seen or hung out with my parents in a long time. I just feel like I should be there and I really want to be there. I need a break from my life sometimes too! So yeah anyway, maybe I can get someone else to go as well! =)
All in all im sure it will turn out fine, just the days leading up to it all just dont seem worth it and makes me dread the whole thing. But I have faith that it will work out! Should be a busy weekend luckily i dont have a really rough week next week!
Oh and I get to move into the Champ's house(the house where we have all our group activities) in May which I am totally excited about! Its a house rooms are huge, full kitchen, cheap rent. It looks like an old persons house but maybe we can fix that up! =)
Anyway, life is going pretty good overall.... Im so thankful for that! God bless!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
stress
this is the most stressful week i have had this semester....
ugh! i have so much to do everyday there just arent enough hours in the day!
also i found out i can graduate early as in this coming December 08 SCARY!
lots of thinking to do!
ugh! i have so much to do everyday there just arent enough hours in the day!
also i found out i can graduate early as in this coming December 08 SCARY!
lots of thinking to do!
Friday, March 14, 2008
back again
So Spring Break was awesome! I got to spend time with my sister, bro-in-law, and my niece. She is so cute with a little bubbly personality. Overall it was a good week. Coming back was an ordeal tho! My flight was canceled, so i bought new tickets with a different airline, that one was delayed, then i had to change flights twice, then finally i left amarillo! haha I got a hotel in dallas because by this point i had missed every flight to nashville anywhere! I even got picked up in a limo to go to the airport the next morning. Not sure how I that happened but all I could think was its about time some good happened! lol It really wasnt all that bad. It was a learning experience for sure, and frankly I never once felt alone or scared. I know God was with me every min.
The only down-side to it all was I had to wait an hour outside for the courtesy van from the hotel to pick me up, and i was already starting to feel kinda yucky, and well that cold air did it. I have been sick ever since. When I woke up Monday morning and i couldnt hear out of either ear i knew it was time to go to the doctor. So i went to the infirmiry on campus after class and the dr there said yep you have a double ear infection and bad cold and cough. Great! haha He also went on to say, you did this same thing last year didnt you. I was like ummm haha yeah. Only after spring break last year i had a double outer ear infection which is by far worse than what i have now! He prescribed i not go anywhere for spring break anymore! I agree! lol I am just now starting to feel better. I cant hear too well still and the coughing is driving me insane but im making it!
Well, its friday and I have no idea what im doing today. Definitely going to clean, because since i have been sick i havent felt like doing anything, and so everything is everywhere! It is also driving me insane! So yeah, then I have Brownie Half day with OPA tomorrow morning, and then we will just see what happens after that! =)
Well there are officially 6 and 1/2 weeks left of school. aka my Junior year, and then I will be a SENIOR!!!!! wooo! Thats so exciting to say and yet soooooooo scary! But I know everything will work out because God is in control and i have given everything to Him. Thank goodness for that! I dont guess i haven anything else intelligent to say, so yeah hope everyone has a great weekend!
The only down-side to it all was I had to wait an hour outside for the courtesy van from the hotel to pick me up, and i was already starting to feel kinda yucky, and well that cold air did it. I have been sick ever since. When I woke up Monday morning and i couldnt hear out of either ear i knew it was time to go to the doctor. So i went to the infirmiry on campus after class and the dr there said yep you have a double ear infection and bad cold and cough. Great! haha He also went on to say, you did this same thing last year didnt you. I was like ummm haha yeah. Only after spring break last year i had a double outer ear infection which is by far worse than what i have now! He prescribed i not go anywhere for spring break anymore! I agree! lol I am just now starting to feel better. I cant hear too well still and the coughing is driving me insane but im making it!
Well, its friday and I have no idea what im doing today. Definitely going to clean, because since i have been sick i havent felt like doing anything, and so everything is everywhere! It is also driving me insane! So yeah, then I have Brownie Half day with OPA tomorrow morning, and then we will just see what happens after that! =)
Well there are officially 6 and 1/2 weeks left of school. aka my Junior year, and then I will be a SENIOR!!!!! wooo! Thats so exciting to say and yet soooooooo scary! But I know everything will work out because God is in control and i have given everything to Him. Thank goodness for that! I dont guess i haven anything else intelligent to say, so yeah hope everyone has a great weekend!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)